Posts Tagged ‘calm’

038: How to Get your Teenagers to Talk to You (and it Starts When They are Young) // Tony Overbay, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

A therapist explains three concrete strategies we can use to help our teenagers know that they can trust us and talk to us

He’s baaccck!  Our favorite male guest is back on the podcast today teaching us how to talk to our children in a way that fosters trust and communication–so they know they can talk to us into their teenage years and beyond.

Tony Overbay is a Licensed Family and Marriage Therapist and a father of four young adults, so he has professional and personal experience with this topic.  Whether you are currently parenting teenagers, or you will be parenting teenagers in a few years, there is something for you in this episode!

Listen in to learn how to truly…

1) Invite open and honest communication, no matter what

2) Listen with empathy and recognize emotional bids (EFT)

3) Follow up to let your children know that their thoughts matter to you

Show Notes

-Tony’s first episode on 3 in 30, “How to Praise Your Child, Even When It Feels Like There is Nothing to Praise”: http://3in30podcast.com/praise/

-Tony’s website: tonyoverbay.com

-Tony’s podcast, The Virtual Couch: http://www.tonyoverbay.com/category/podcast/

Tony’s top parenting book recommendation: Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured-Heart Approach, https://amzn.to/2ucXf3C

-Emotionally-Focused Therapy, Sue Johnson: http://drsuejohnson.com/emotionally-focused-therapy-2/what-is-eft/

 

034: How to Meditate in the Midst of Mayhem // Dr. Leah Weiss

Do you laugh aloud at the thought of having a few minutes to meditate during busy days with your children?  What if I told you that you could be meditating THE ENTIRE DAY, even in the midst of chaotic, everyday moments with your little minions?

Dr. Leah Weiss–an author, a mindfulness expert who studied with the Dali Lama, a professor at the Stanford Graduate School of Business, and a mother of three little children–teaches that this is possible.  It just requires that we redefine (or rather, correctly define) the word “meditation.”

The word “meditation” is a translation from the Tibetan word “gom.”  Dr. Weiss points out that a more literal definition of this word is simply “familiarization” or “getting to know your mind and heart.”  When explained this way, busy moms can let go of visions of silent meditation rooms and burning incense (though those things are great too!) and instead embrace every moment with their children as an opportunity to “familiarize” themselves with their own hearts and minds.  In fact, motherhood itself can become meditation.

Join me for this fascinating conversation with a renowned mindfulness expert who teaches us the Tibetan process of “dampa sum,” meaning “good in the beginning, good in the middle, and good in the end.”

Show Notes

LeahWeissPhd.com

“How We Work: Live Your Purpose, Reclaim Your Sanity, and Embrace the Daily Grind” by Dr. Leah Weiss https://amzn.to/2sz6Wby

“Motherhood Matters: Are You Willing to Suffer?” by Laura Fanucci: https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865638913/Motherhood-Matters-Are-you-willing-to-suffer.html

030: How to Coach your Children through their Big Emotions // Georgia Anderson of KnowHowMom.com

3 Steps for coaching your children through their big emotions

Our little kids come with big emotions—too big, it sometimes seems, for their little bodies. And sometimes (often?) those feelings just come bursting out in bizarre and irrational behaviors.

As parents, this can bring out the bizarre and irrational in us as well, despite our best intentions to stay calm and level-headed.

Today on the podcast, we have a parenting expert who is going to teach us how to coach our children through their emotions, so we can keep ahold of our own.

Georgia Anderson of knowhowmom.com is a wife, mother, stepmother, mother-in-law, and grandmother to 28 people she adores. She has taught parenting classes for three decades and is a Certified Active Parenting Instructor and a Gottman Trained Educator.

In this episode, she walks us through three of the steps to “emotion coach” our children through their big emotions:

 

1) Notice emotions when they are small.

2) Put words to emotions.

3) Set limits and problem solve.

 

There are so many gems and insights in this episode, as she walks me through a specific scenario when my six-year-old son got extremely angry.  I think it will be helpful for you to hear me coached on how I can coach him.  I have applied these steps in the weeks since this interview was recorded, and it has honestly changed my relationship with my son.  Please listen!

Notes

Georgia’s website: knowhowmom.com

Georgia’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/knowhowmomtips/

Upcoming Emotion Coaching Workshop with Georgia: http://www.knowhowmom.com/class/emotion-coaching-for-parents-2/

Book Recommendation: Feelings Buried Alive Never Die by Karol K. Truman

027: 3 Battles You Can Let Your Child Win // Lisa Andersen of Thriving Motherhood

What three battles would you let your child win?

If you feel like you face battle after battle with your child, this episode is for you!  Lisa Andersen, a mother of four who is passionate about helping moms thrive, teaches us 3 power struggles we can opt out of.

I’m not going to tell you ahead of time what the three battles are…so you’ll have to listen! 😉

Chime in and tell us your opinions and ideas in the comments on this post or on my Instagram account, @ https://www.instagram.com/3in30podcast/

 

Show Notes

-Lisa Andersen’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thrivingmotherhood/

-Thriving Motherhood Conference: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/thriving-mothers-conference-express-session-tickets-44616612489

-Ep. 017 with Jody Moore: http://3in30podcast.com/ep-017-3-keys-happier-marriage-jody-moore-bold-new-mom/

-Ep. 004 with Ralphie Jacobs: http://3in30podcast.com/yelling/

-Ellen Satyr, Expert on Positive and Joyful Eating and Feeding: https://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org/

-Division of Responsibility with Eating: https://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org/how-to-feed/the-division-of-responsibility-in-feeding/

-Amy McCready, Positive Parenting Solutions (When-Then tactic): https://www.positiveparentingsolutions.com/

 

 

026: How to Praise Your Child When It Feels Like There is Nothing to Praise // Tony Overbay, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel truly stuck in a rut of nagging, bossing, and criticizing my children.  This is not who I want to be–but when I can’t get my children to listen to me or to behave, what other option do I have??

Gratefully, Tony Overbay, a professional counselor and father of four, is on the podcast today to teach us a better way.

Using the principles of a powerful parenting and child development model called The Nurtured-Heart Approach, Tony shares four ways that we can effectively praise our children in order to energize the positive in them and in our homes:

Listen in as Tony teaches us how to acknowledge and praise…

 

1) What we see our children doing (active recognition)

2) What we see our children doing, plus what that shows about their greatness (experiential recognition)

3) What we don’t see our children doing (proactive recognition)

4) What we want to see our children doing (creative recognition)

 

This episode has the potential to change your parenting and the environment in your home forever.  Don’t miss it!

 

Show Notes:

Tony’s website: TonyOverbay.com

Tony’s podcast, The Virtual Couch: http://www.tonyoverbay.com/category/podcast/

Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured-Heart Approach by Howard Glasser

Children’s Success Foundation

PDF of the 4 Recognition Types: http://www.naswwv.org/index.php/documents/177-c1-wendy-baracka-transforming-the-difficult-child-nha-recognition-techniques/file