Posts Tagged ‘discipline’

038: How to Get your Teenagers to Talk to You (and it Starts When They are Young) // Tony Overbay, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

A therapist explains three concrete strategies we can use to help our teenagers know that they can trust us and talk to us

He’s baaccck!  Our favorite male guest is back on the podcast today teaching us how to talk to our children in a way that fosters trust and communication–so they know they can talk to us into their teenage years and beyond.

Tony Overbay is a Licensed Family and Marriage Therapist and a father of four young adults, so he has professional and personal experience with this topic.  Whether you are currently parenting teenagers, or you will be parenting teenagers in a few years, there is something for you in this episode!

Listen in to learn how to truly…

1) Invite open and honest communication, no matter what

2) Listen with empathy and recognize emotional bids (EFT)

3) Follow up to let your children know that their thoughts matter to you

Show Notes

-Tony’s first episode on 3 in 30, “How to Praise Your Child, Even When It Feels Like There is Nothing to Praise”: http://3in30podcast.com/praise/

-Tony’s website: tonyoverbay.com

-Tony’s podcast, The Virtual Couch: http://www.tonyoverbay.com/category/podcast/

Tony’s top parenting book recommendation: Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured-Heart Approach, https://amzn.to/2ucXf3C

-Emotionally-Focused Therapy, Sue Johnson: http://drsuejohnson.com/emotionally-focused-therapy-2/what-is-eft/

 

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027: 3 Battles You Can Let Your Child Win // Lisa Andersen of Thriving Motherhood

What three battles would you let your child win?

If you feel like you face battle after battle with your child, this episode is for you!  Lisa Andersen, a mother of four who is passionate about helping moms thrive, teaches us 3 power struggles we can opt out of.

I’m not going to tell you ahead of time what the three battles are…so you’ll have to listen! 😉

Chime in and tell us your opinions and ideas in the comments on this post or on my Instagram account, @ https://www.instagram.com/3in30podcast/

 

Show Notes

-Lisa Andersen’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thrivingmotherhood/

-Thriving Motherhood Conference: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/thriving-mothers-conference-express-session-tickets-44616612489

-Ep. 017 with Jody Moore: http://3in30podcast.com/ep-017-3-keys-happier-marriage-jody-moore-bold-new-mom/

-Ep. 004 with Ralphie Jacobs: http://3in30podcast.com/yelling/

-Ellen Satyr, Expert on Positive and Joyful Eating and Feeding: https://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org/

-Division of Responsibility with Eating: https://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org/how-to-feed/the-division-of-responsibility-in-feeding/

-Amy McCready, Positive Parenting Solutions (When-Then tactic): https://www.positiveparentingsolutions.com/

 

 

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026: How to Praise Your Child When It Feels Like There is Nothing to Praise // Tony Overbay, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

How to Praise Your Child When It Feels LIke There is Nothing to Praise __ Tony Overbay, LMFT

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel truly stuck in a rut of nagging, bossing, and criticizing my children.  This is not who I want to be–but when I can’t get my children to listen to me or to behave, what other option do I have??

Gratefully, Tony Overbay, a professional counselor and father of four, is on the podcast today to teach us a better way.

Using the principles of a powerful parenting and child development model called The Nurtured-Heart Approach, Tony shares four ways that we can effectively praise our children in order to energize the positive in them and in our homes:

Listen in as Tony teaches us how to acknowledge and praise…

 

1) What we see our children doing (active recognition)

2) What we see our children doing, plus what that shows about their greatness (experiential recognition)

3) What we don’t see our children doing (proactive recognition)

4) What we want to see our children doing (creative recognition)

 

This episode has the potential to change your parenting and the environment in your home forever.  Don’t miss it!

 

Show Notes:

Tony’s website: TonyOverbay.com

Tony’s podcast, The Virtual Couch: http://www.tonyoverbay.com/category/podcast/

Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured-Heart Approach by Howard Glasser

Children’s Success Foundation

PDF of the 4 Recognition Types: http://www.naswwv.org/index.php/documents/177-c1-wendy-baracka-transforming-the-difficult-child-nha-recognition-techniques/file

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019: Helping our Kids Rewire Difficult Behaviors // Chrissy Austin, Speech Language Pathologist

Chrissy Austin, a SLP, teaches us a three-step process for helping our children rewire patterns of negative behavior

All of our kids get stuck in behaviors that are difficult for us and others to deal with–perhaps it’s whining, interrupting, fighting with siblings, or defiance.

According to Chrissy Austin, a speech language pathologist with 17 years of experience teaching children social skills and communication, these neurological “loops” can be rewired.  She does it every day in her private practice, and, in this week’s episode, she teaches us how to do it!  We can follow this simple three-step process with our kids, in our homes:

 

1) Identify the specific troublesome behavior, and then ask yourself, “What SKILL does my child need to learn in order to change this behavior?”

2) Sit down with the child and make a GOAL to learn the new skill.  Have him or her make it visual by writing it down and/or drawing a picture.  Consider adding a hand cue.

3) Offer positive reinforcement through verbal praise whenever the child is working on their goal, and consider adding additional reinforcement through earning privileges, if needed.

 

Chrissy offers so many fantastic tips and interesting bits of research throughout the interview.  You won’t want to miss it, especially if you sometimes struggle with knowing how to help your children change.

Show Notes

-Michelle Garcia Winter: https://www.socialthinking.com/

-“Kids Beyond Limits” by Anat Baniel

-“Finally Focused” by James Greenblatt

 

 

 

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