“Parents act as mirrors for their children. Children learn who they are in the reflection of another person’s watchful gaze.”
Dr. Katie Penry, a licensed clinical psychologist and mother of two young children, is on the podcast today teaching us the brain research behind why we need to look up from our phones and engage more with our little children.
And she doesn’t just tell us WHY to do this…she also tells us HOW! Listen in as she explains each of the following takeaways:
1) Decide on some sacred spaces and places where you will not use your phone. (This matters more than arbitrary time limits for yourself.)
2) Tell your kids what you are doing when you are looking at your phone.
3) Use your phone’s non-notification settings to help you be present at important times of day.
Listen to the podcast as an introduction to Dr. Penry’s work, and then head to her website to sign up for her email course called the “Look Up Challenge”: afriendlyaffair.com/lookupchallenge
Fascinating Facts from the Interview:
-Almost 80% of your child’s brain development happens from age 0-3 years, through consistent verbal and non-verbal interaction with their parents
-Look at your baby and attune to who they are and what they love–react to each other–Harvard Psychologists call this “Serve and Return”
-Daniel Stern, a renowned American psychologist, found that 70%-80% of the time that your baby is alert, he/she is looking at you.
-Babies are born able to see the exact distance from their biological mother’s eye to nipple. (!!!)
-Dr. Katie Penry’s FREE email course, the #LookUpChallenge”: https://afriendlyaffair.lpages.co/look-up-challenge/
-Sign up to receive a monthly PDF of all the podcast takeaways: 3in30podcast.com
-Dr. Katie Penry’s website: https://www.afriendlyaffair.com/
-Dr. Katie Penry’s Instagram account: https://www.instagram.com/afriendlyaffair/
-Children’s book about the life of Nelle Harper Lee, the author of To Kill a Mockingbird: https://www.amazon.com/Alabama-Spitfire-Story-Harper-Mockingbird/dp/0062456709
Though you may never have defined it as “soul fever” before, all parents have witnessed this malady taking over their children from time to time…when kids have had too much excitement, too little sleep, too much sugar, and too little downtime–and their behavior shows it!
On today’s episode, Carrie Thomas Scott–a licensed professional counselor and a mother herself–uses the four pillars of Simplicity Parenting to teach us how to protect our kids from catching a “soul fever” this holiday season.
Listen in for concrete strategies on how to help your children stay balanced and soul-healthy this holiday using these four pillars:
4. Filtering Out the Adult World
Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne
It’s the witching hour–when you are trying to get dinner made–and your four-year-old son is whining that there’s nothing to do. You walk with him to the playroom, only to find that he has dumped out every bin of toys, yet can’t seem to find anything suitable to hold his attention.
Unable to face the mess of Legos, cars, Magformers, and stuffed animals that are now strewn everywhere, you simply close the door to the playroom and pretend it doesn’t exist. You turn on the TV to keep your little man occupied, and you wonder, What new toy should we get him for Christmas that he will actually play with?
If this scene sounds familiar, this episode is for you. I invited Tana Parke, a mother of five children and a semi-professional organizer, to share three strategies for keeping our kids’ clutter at bay. Our discussion includes exciting topics, like:
- Why you should hide some toys from your children for a while
- Who might be happy to receive some of the little trinkets that your kids have collected (it’s not who you think!)
- How to teach your kids to think critically about whether or not they actually want a new toy or trinket
- Why The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up doesn’t work for children (and how you can modify it!)
- How to allow your children to have some “treasures” while also keeping them from being hoarders
…and much more!
“At any given point, you can say, ‘This is not how the story is going to end.'”
Cate Johnson was a mother of two young children with a big, beautiful home in the country. From the outside, it looked like she was “living the dream,” but inside, she felt like she was drowning.
She craved peace and connection with her children–but instead she felt only chaos and overwhelm. She spent hours cleaning her big home while her kids watched television. She felt heartbroken that she was not the mother that she had always wanted to be.
In this powerful episode, Cate shares three small but significant changes that transformed their home environment:
1) Using the five senses to create a haven of peace.
2) Designating a “kid of the day” to eliminate fighting.
3) Structuring their family time around rhythms to create stability.
Cate is now a fulfilled, empowered mother, and she has a message of hope for all of us: We can have more peaceful homes, no matter where we live.
Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne