Five years ago, I realized that I needed to go to counseling.Ā I had been coping with stress and heartache through both undereating and overeating for almost ten years, and my negative thoughts about myself had become debilitating and all-consuming.
I sought treatment from an outpatient eating disorder clinic, and I fully expected my counselor to teach me how to control my eating; instead, my counselor went to the root of the problem and taught me how to control my thinking.
I learned that destructive behaviors (such as eating disorders) are part of a three-part cycle: we have a negative thought about ourselves, we then feel a negative emotion about ourselves, and we then cope with that feeling through a destructive behavior.Ā In order to stop this cycle, we must have strategies to stop the negative self-talk that starts it all in the first place!
Whether or not you've ever struggled with an eating disorder, I think this episode will benefit you.Ā I share three of the best tools that I learned in counseling:
3 KEY TAKEAWAYS:
- Reject āfiltered thinkingā (seeing yourself through one negative moment). Instead, zoom out and look at all of the evidence that supports ābig-picture thinking.ā
- Talk to yourself kindlyāthe way you would talk to your best friend, sister, or daughter.Ā
- Use coping statements to help you re-center and stay calm in moments when you might āspiralā into negative self-talk. Ex: āIt is what it is.ā āToday is not forever.ā āI did the best I could in that moment.ā āPlot twist!ā
Additional Resources
Unhealthy Stress or Habits? Break the Cycle (podcast with Power of Moms): https://powerofmoms.com/unhealthy-stress/
Listening to and Loving your Body through Intuitive Eating (podcast with Power of Moms): https://powerofmoms.com/intuitive-eating/
"It Is What It Is" (article with a list of coping strategies): https://powerofmoms.com/it-is-what-it-is/
"The Surprising Way I Confronted my Eating Disorder" (full narrative therapy): https://powerofmoms.com/eating-disorder/
Related Episodes:
50 Ways to Lighten Your Mental Load