Are you tired of trying self-care that doesn’t actually help you?
I used to think that self-care meant bubble baths, shopping trips, or the occasional manicure. And for some moms, those things are truly nourishing. But for me? They often left me feeling more drained than restored.
Can you relate?
I’ll never forget the day I had a couple of rare, kid-free hours and decided to head to Target for what I told myself would be a little “me time.” But halfway through the trip, I was rushing through the aisles with a list in hand, grabbing snacks for my kids and light bulbs for the house. I wasn’t relaxed—I was overstimulated. I came home tired, not refreshed.
And that’s when I realized: this isn’t self-care. This is just survival dressed up as self-care.
Why Self-Care Feels So Confusing for Moms
So many of the moms I work with tell me the same thing—they’re tired, overstretched, and constantly giving to everyone around them. But when they finally get a moment to themselves, they’re not even sure what to do with it. What actually fills their cup? What’s worth their precious time and energy?
That’s why I invited self-care coach Mia Hemstad back to the podcast this week. If you’ve ever felt unsure how to care for yourself in a way that actually works, this conversation is for you.
Mia shares her 4 B’s of Self-Care Framework, a simple but deeply thoughtful structure that helps moms reflect on what they really need—mentally, physically, emotionally, and even logistically. This isn’t about adding more to your plate. It’s about honoring your needs with more clarity and kindness.
4 Types of Self-Care for Moms that Actually Work:
1. Basic Self-Care.
This is the foundation. These are the things that support your physical body: sleep, nourishment, hydration, movement, and hygiene. Mia reminds us that these may sound simple, but they’re often the hardest to maintain in motherhood—and that’s exactly why they matter so much. If your basic needs aren’t met, burnout is right around the corner.
2. Boring Self-Care.
Think of this as life-admin self-care: making your own doctor appointments, paying bills, decluttering the car, returning that lingering Amazon package. It’s not glamorous—but these small acts of follow-through clear mental clutter and reduce the quiet stress that builds up over time. It’s care that gives you peace of mind.
3. Brilliant Self-Care.
This is the care that lights you up. It’s about doing something that makes you feel like yourself—not just “mom.” Maybe it’s dancing, painting, reading fiction, or spending time with friends. The things that bring you joy and spark your energy are worth making space for. They restore your spirit in ways the other B’s can’t.
4. Bougie Self-Care.
This is care that feels like a gift—something that says “I’m worthy.” Whether that’s buying a cozy robe, investing in a robot vacuum to save time, or simply spending a few uninterrupted hours alone, bougie self-care is about permission. Permission to invest in yourself with love and intention—not because you earned it, but because you deserve it.
Your Turn: A Soul-Care Check-In
Whether you’re still in the thick of summer or already transitioning into a new school-year rhythm, I hope you’ll take a few minutes after this episode to pause and check in with yourself.
- Which of the 4 B’s is easiest for you to prioritize right now?
- Which one is getting overlooked—and might need a little extra love?
- What’s one small thing you can do this week to mother yourself well?
You don’t have to overhaul your life to feel better. Just start where you are. And if this conversation speaks to you, I’d love to invite you to join me next month when the Self-Assured Motherhood program opens again. You’ll learn to build sustainable soul-care routines and finally feel like you again, even in the middle of motherhood.
What do you think about these 4 types of self-care for moms that actually work from Mia Hemstad? Tell us in the comments below!
***
Related Episodes on Self-Care for Moms that Actually Work:
About Our Guest:
Mia Hemstad is a mom of two kids, a self-care coach, podcast host, and the founder of The No Longer Last Journey,™ which is a movement to empower women to make their wellbeing a priority. Mia is also a survivor of abuse and postpartum depression and anxiety; and she currently lives with diagnosed PTSD and depression. She is known for her honest stories of what it’s like to be a mom with mental health challenges and for her doable approach to self-care. Her honest and inspiring message has led to features in Romper, Yahoo, Love What Matters, and Cafe Mom. Mia currently lives with her husband and two children in Portugal.
Get in Touch with Our Guest:
- Website: nolongerlast.com
- Free 4B Self-Care Framework© Guide: miahemstad.com/guide
- Podcast: nolongerlast.com/blog
- Instagram: @nolongerlast
Sponsors:
- K12: Go to K12.com/TAKEAWAYS today to find a tuition-free K12-powered school near you and enroll now.
- BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.
- KiwiCo: Tinker, Create, and Innovate with KiwiCo! Get up to 50% off your first crate at kiwico.com, promo code 3in30
IF YOU WANT MORE:
- Join me on Instagram!
- Get weekly-ish emails with BTS of my life
- Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course
