A couple of years ago at breakfast, I threw a waffle across the room, and I realized that managing holiday overwhelm as a mom requires more than just willpower or positive thinking.
Here’s what I’ve learned: I can’t think my way out of dysregulation. I can’t shame myself into being calmer. I can’t just “try harder” to keep it together. Because dysregulation isn’t a thinking problem—it’s a body problem.
Why This Matters
Managing Holiday Overwhelm as a Mom: 3 Key Insights
1. Your sensory systems directly impact how you experience motherhood—and there are nine of them, not five.
Most of us learned about five senses in school, but there are actually nine sensory systems that affect our regulation. Proprioception is how we know where our body ends and something else begins—if you’re proprioceptive-seeking, you’re recharged by touch and movement. Vestibular is located in our inner ear and governs movement and balance. Interoception lets us know what’s happening inside our body (hunger, tiredness, needing to use the bathroom). Neuroception is our “spidey sense” that picks up on the energy in a room—if you’re neuroceptive-sensitive, you feel everyone else’s stress like it’s your own, which can be especially overwhelming during holiday gatherings with extended family.
2. Sensory regulation is essential for emotional regulation—you can’t think your way out of dysregulation.
When we’re dysregulated, our rational thinking brain (prefrontal cortex) shuts down and our reactive feelings brain (amygdala) takes over. That’s why we know better but can’t access better in the moment. To get our thinking brain back online, we need to complete the stress cycle in our bodies by producing serotonin or oxytocin, not just masking it with dopamine hits like scrolling or productivity. This means moving our body, taking deep breaths, asking for a hug, or stepping outside—anything that actually pumps the brakes on cortisol and adrenaline instead of just hitting the snooze button on it.
3. You can bring more joy and presence into motherhood with practical, accessible regulation strategies.
Regulation doesn’t require a spa day or a 30-minute workout. It can be a one-song dance party in your kitchen, shaking your hands for 10 seconds, squeezing and releasing your fists, wearing earplugs during the 4-7 PM chaos, or taking everything off your kitchen counter and putting it in a drawer so you have one visually calm space. The key is understanding your unique sensory system (you can take Alyssa’s free quiz at seedquiz.com) and building micro-moments of regulation throughout your day instead of waiting until you’ve completely lost it.
Wrap Up
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What did you think of this episode on managing holiday overwhelm with Alyssa? Was it helpful? Comment below!
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Announcements:
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✨ Take Alyssa’s free sensory regulation questionnaire at seedquiz.com to discover what drains you, what recharges you, and how to support your nervous system this holiday season.
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✨ Flecks of Gold is on sale for 10% off! This journal is designed to help you savor the small, sacred moments of motherhood and find beauty in the everyday chaos.
Related Episodes like this one on Partnership in Parenting:
About Our Guest:
Alyssa Blask Campbell, M.Ed., is the CEO and founder of Seed & Sew and a globally recognized expert in emotional development. With a master’s degree in early childhood education, Alyssa has dedicated her career to advancing the field of emotional intelligence through speaking engagements, workshops, and consulting. She co-created the Collaborative Emotion Processing (CEP) method, revolutionizing how adults understand and respond to children’s emotions. Her work is amplified through her podcast, Voices of Your Village, uniting parents, caregivers, educators, and experts across more than 100 countries. Her books, Tiny Humans, Big Emotions and Big Kids, Bigger Feelings, were published by HarperCollins, and her insights have been featured in The Washington Post and other prominent publications. For more information, visit seedandsew.org and follow @seed.and.sew.
Get in Touch With Our Guest:
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Website: www.seedandsew.org
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Instagram: @seed.and.sew
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Hi Rachel! I have listened to your podcast my whole 12 years of being a mother & appreciate you sharing your hilariously real moments of motherhood frustration (I.e. throwing the waffle at your son!) I laughed out loud in my car and then teared up with gratitude knowing I wasn’t the only mom who would do the same thing! 😂😂 I have three amazing and spirited children and am constantly looking for ways to regulate my emotions, my kids emotions and bring more calm into our lives. This episode resonated with me more than any I’ve heard, I can’t wait to take the seed quiz. Thank you!
Happy holidays,
Nichole
Nichole! I am so, so happy to hear this! I will make sure to pass this on to Rachel (I manage the website). Thank you for listening and supporting! Your kids are lucky to have such an intentional mom! Happy holidays!