Hey friends, happy June! I sort of can't believe we are already here, and before we get too far into summer schedules and camps and all the things, I wanted to spend some time today telling you about the absolute highlight of my May: The Self-Assured Motherhood Retreat.
I hosted this event for the women in my SAM program in my hometown in the mountains of Idaho, and it was everything I hoped it would be and more. About 50 women came from all over the country—and we even had a few from Canada!—and on Friday, we walked together on my town's historic bike path and had a homemade dinner at my family's lovely cabin, with so much laughter and conversation and bonding.
Then on Saturday, we gathered for an all-day conference at a beautiful hotel with keynote speakers, workshops, yoga, crafts, and more. It was heaven to be together with women who are thoughtful, open, funny, wise, vulnerable, and so genuinely supportive of one another.
And now that I've had a couple of weeks to reflect on the experience, I realized there was one big theme threaded through almost every conversation, class, and moment of the retreat—and that theme was support.
I think sometimes, especially in motherhood, we accidentally absorb this idea that being "self-assured" means being totally self-sufficient. Like if we were really emotionally healthy or confident or mature, we would just… handle everything on our own.
But that's actually not what I've observed in the women who are thriving, and that really hit home for me at the retreat. The women who seem most grounded and alive and emotionally resilient are not women who never need support. They are women who know how to seek it, receive it, create it, and offer it to others.
So let's dive into three takeaways about the kinds of support moms need in order to thrive.
3 KEY TAKEAWAYS:
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Mothers thrive when they regularly support their nervous systems. As busy moms, we often try to "mindset" our way through stress — thinking more positively, being more disciplined, getting more perspective. But sometimes our bodies are carrying stress, overload, and emotional exhaustion in a way that can't simply be solved by thinking differently. At the retreat, Layne Burkette, a licensed therapist specializing in somatic support, opened my eyes to the fact that our nervous systems sometimes need direct, physical support too. She taught us small practices called "micropauses" — like lifting and dropping your shoulders, rubbing your hands together and placing them over your eyes, or stroking your arms — and I could feel a real shift in my body just from those few minutes of practice. I heard women saying afterward, "I didn't realize how dysregulated I was until we slowed down." I felt that too.
- Mothers thrive when they seek support for their dreams. I'll be honest — I'm not always naturally the person asking for support for myself or my own ideas. But putting together this retreat really stretched me in that way. When the budget felt impossible, instead of shutting the dream down, I asked a different question: "What kind of support would make this possible?" That question led me to seek sponsors for the first time — but only companies whose work I already use, believe in, and recommend. And what ended up happening felt less like sponsorship and more like collaboration. The retreat became better because I was willing to ask for help, and I keep thinking about how often we as mothers shut down our dreams too quickly because we assume we have to carry the entire burden ourselves.
- Mothers thrive when they gather with women who support and strengthen them. At the retreat, I taught the women about something called mycorrhiza — an underground network of tiny fungal threads that connect the roots of trees throughout a forest. Healthy, established trees use this network to send nutrients to struggling trees, and to share distress signals so nearby trees can strengthen their defenses before danger even reaches them. When I read about this, it really struck me, because that is exactly what I want for mothers. And I watched it happen in real time at the retreat — women who had never met before sitting around tables, laughing and crying and sharing their biggest lessons. That kind of community doesn't require flying to Idaho. It starts with intentionally seeking out spaces where real connection can grow, whether that's a program, a book club, a walk with another mom, or simply being brave enough to open up honestly about something hard.
So as I've reflected on the Retreat over the past few weeks, I think the overarching lesson I keep coming back to is this: thriving mothers are not mothers who never need support. They are mothers who learn how to seek it, receive it, and offer it to others.
Sometimes support looks like caring for your nervous system and recognizing that your body needs care too, not just your mind.
Sometimes support looks like collaboration and allowing other people to help make meaningful dreams and experiences possible.
And sometimes support looks like gathering with women who strengthen you, encourage you, and remind you that you are not alone in the work of becoming the kind of mother you want to be.
I love you, my friends. I deeply believe that you deserve support in all of its forms, and I hope that this podcast can continue to be a support to you in your self-assured motherhood journey.
Retreat Sponsors:
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