Battling depression in motherhood is lonely, grueling, and unfair.
My older sister, Sarah McKenna, has battled depression and bipolar disorder from a young age, and she has helped me and countless others in our own mental health journeys by being open about hers. I have never known anyone as brave and tenacious as Sarah, and I’m honored to share with you her wisdom on surviving depression in motherhood.
While the subject of mental illness is heavy and sometimes hard to want to talk about, it is so necessary.
In this discussion, we aim to build awareness for moms who may wonder if they are struggling with depression, as well as to provide hope for moms who know they are in the midst of it and crave to be understood.
Before we get into the takeaways, I think it’s important to note the sneaky ways depression can manifest. It’s fairly common knowledge that depression can be seen through sadness, darkness, hopelessness, crying, guilt, and self-doubt. But, depression can also manifest through exhaustion, feeling antisocial/withdrawn, appetite changes, anger, rage, and irritability.
If any of these feel overpowering in your life, please reach out for support! Depression is hard at any time in life, but there is an added depth to the struggle when you are also trying to be a mom while you cope.
Sarah offers three takeaways for basic coping skills and self-care while dealing with depression. While these tools don’t cure depression, they hopefully can help you muster the energy to get through the day.
Also, both Sarah and I acknowledge that these tools sound simple, but they are certainly not easy (especially when you are struggling to simply get through the day!).
3 Takeaways on Surviving Depression in Motherhood
1. Eat.
Nutrition is important medicine in battling depression! Your body and mind are unable to stay as resilient when you aren’t well-fed. Have easy-to-grab and nourishing foods on hand for when preparing food feels like an impossible task. When you go to the grocery store on a good day, try to buy stuff to help your future, struggling self. Buy things for the kids that are easy and filling. But also, buy nutrient-dense, easy food for yourself. When you can summon the energy to cook, double it, and live off the leftovers. If you’re struggling with this, ask for help! The people who love you want to help, and feeding you is a great way to have them support you through your dark days.
2. Sleep.
Pay attention to too much/too little sleep and aim for a regular sleep schedule. If you’re a new mom, when the baby is napping, you should be napping! Your sanity is worth more than a clean house! Too little sleep can lead to irritability and anger. Too much sleep can lead to further isolation and apathy. Make your sleep schedule a high priority! The kids can do quiet time! And you can ask your partner, family, or friends for support in this as well. Regular sleep is key to helping you through depression.
3. Move.
When we say move, we don’t mean you need to go the gym and do an intense class! A walk or gentle yoga totally counts! Sarah loves to walk on the treadmill while watching a funny show. Rachel loves walks in nature. A lot of people like yoga because it’s meditative and relaxing. For some people, running is therapeutic. There are so many ways this can work. It can help if you build this into your routine so your brain knows it’s what you do each day. If you can get yourself to do this, it always helps.
If you are clawing through the depths of depression as a mom, then please know, you’re not alone. These takeaways are a great first step to surviving, but I also encourage you to reach out to friends and loved ones, and, if needed, seek professional help.
Be sure to check out part two in this series about medication, therapy, and some of the darkest moments of our journeys. Wherever you or a loved one is in the mental health journey, please know that there is hope!!
If you want to listen to the full episode, click on the player above, or head to your favorite podcast platform.
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Was this conversation on surviving depression in motherhood helpful? What helps you? We’d love to hear in the comments below!
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Related Episodes like this one on how to survive depression in motherhood:
- 108: How to Get Help for Mental Illness// Sarah McKenna
- 319: Three Tool to Manage Anxiety & Depression // Cheryl Cardall
- 184: Living Well with Depression & Anxiety // Jenny Showalter
Get in Touch with Our Guest:
- Instagram: @bombshellbling
- Website: Bombshell Bling
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I loved this episode and want to say thank you for sharing. My husband was recently formally diagnosed with bipolar 2. He like your sister probably has had it since middle schools it was missed diagnosed as ADHD. It has become really severe the last few months. It was really helpful to hear your stories and helpful tips. He has been established on meds and good doctors. However as a spouse of someone with bipolar I believe it would be helpful and interesting to hear from your spouses on how they manage and how they help you manage. Then have three tips on how we a spouse can most help you in both your time in need and on a daily basis. Also three tips on how we as a spouse can take care of ourselves while taking care of you because I know there are times that his high and low can be overwhelming for myself. I look forward to listening to the 2nd part of this series.
What a fantastic idea! I will talk to Sarah! THANK YOU! Also, as for your own self-care when your spouse is struggling, I think many of the tips we talk about in the episodes could apply for YOU too: Eat, Sleep, Move! Go to counseling if you need support to be the supporter! And find a creative outlet!! I will see what else Sarah has to add.
MUCH LOVE! Rachel